crestfallenfor | IC Inbox for Prismatica

I would not ask that of you.

[Because he would get annoyed, with himself really, if Sylvain paid for everything all the time. He would feel guilty about not contributing. Just like he feels guilty that Dimitri wishes to handle all his needs.

He has to give back.

But he feels...lost with this moonlacing business. It's been so long since he's been around people so willing to be affectionate with him that he doesn't truly know where to begin. And so he is beginning with Sylvain. He trusts him and feels that he will be a good guide in this new uncertain world.

And now it's his choice. Where does he...begin?]

...

[This is difficult when he's honestly so inexperienced in literally all of it.]

I will be honest with you. I have no experience at all in any of this. Please, tell me what you would recommend.

[And his cheeks actually color.]

I know you wouldn't.

[He wouldn't mind, really, but he knows Dedue would, and that's as good a reason as any to not pay for everything all the time. He'll still spoil him when he can, but... 'a lot' is much more palatable than 'all the time'.

It's not much of a surprise to hear that Dedue is inexperienced - they were young when Duscur happened, and while he could have had some experience before that... he didn't seem the type to have. And after... well. They were both well aware of the atmosphere regarding people from his country. But that also means the situation is... somewhat delicate. He doesn't want to overstep and hurt his friend, but... he also needs to take care of him, and guide him in this.

For now, he starts with easy, casual affection, wrapping around his arm as he pulls him further into the apartment, over to the couch.

(And taking note of how cute he is when he blushes...)]

Let's get comfortable for now, first. But then... is there anything you don't want to do? With me?

[Best to set up boundaries first, after all.]

[Since there is cloth in the way, it's not as strong a lacing as it could be. He doesn't mind though. Dedue just enjoys it as he walks with him to the couch while taking note of the apartment and how it reflects who Sylvain is as a person. Clean. Because he can control this.

He doesn't comment on that. He's always known this about his companion. After all, he understands his various companions far better than they might think he does.

Once they are sitting, he looks over at Sylvain. He appreciates the question but there's only one truth here.]

No.

[He trusts him. With everything.]

You're sure...?

[Because there's a lot he could do, and with how exhausted Dedue seems - how low on chroma he seems - there's a lot he should do, but... if it's his first in everything...

Well, Sylvain doesn't mind, he just also doesn't want Dedue to mind, either.

For now, though, once his companion is settled in, he shifts, straddles his lap and drapes his arms over his shoulders, reaching up to undo his hair and run fingers over his scalp. Starting gentle for now, slow...]

If I overstep, tell me.

[Not a question.]

[Oh. He blinks as Sylvain suddenly is on his lap, cheeks coloring a little. Where is he meant to put his hands? It's unclear but he settles them on his hips as he feels his hair fall free. The long mohawk portion of it anyway. It feels nice, the fingers moving over his scalp, the moonlacing starting at his head. He almost closes his eyes actually.

But then Dedue nods in agreement. Yes, he will tell him if he oversteps a boundary of some sort. That is a promise.

And then he does close his eyes, unable to resist how nice those hands feel running along his head. The last time anyone did this he was a child. He's for gotten how wonderful it feels.]

[He's meant to put his hands wherever is most comfortable for him to put his hands - and if he doesn't know right away, Sylvain is confident he'll figure something out sooner or later. And he does! He can't help but smile slightly when he feels his hands on his hips relatively quickly - at least he's picked up that much.

And with the assurance that he'll stop him if he goes too far, he has renewed confidence in simply acting.

Which is why he presses a little closer to him, leans in, catches his lips in a kiss that starts relatively chaste - to give Dedue a chance to pull back or push him away if he wants - but it will escalate soon enough.]

[It's, unsurprisingly, another first of his. He's never been kissed before and he's finding that it's also a nice feeling. It's warm and inviting. A part of him hopes that Sylvain doesn't mind that he is likely terrible at this. It's certainly not for lack of trying, that is for certain.

Hesitantly, and only because he doesn't know what he's doing, he does try to kiss back. Is it...correct? He doesn't know.

But he can at least hope it's nice enough.]

[He's not terrible at it at all - but it's still a little bit obvious that it's his first. That's fine, though. He's trying, he's being considerate in his own ways... and he'll learn. That's all Sylvain has any right to ask for.

Besides, there's no "correct" way to do this, only what feels right. And this is... nice. Very much so, so there's even less hesitation when he deepens the kiss further, parting his lips to run his tongue over Dedue's.

So. Yes. It's very much 'nice enough'.]

[The tongue is odd at first. Even lifting his own to meet him feels odd. But he pushes forward because past the odd feeling is something welcome. Something nice. Dedue feels how warm this contact is, something other than the feeling of the moonlacing. Such affection is something he hasn't known he's starved for. Now that he has it, he feels so inadequate. A desire rising in him to be better. To be worthy of the gift being given to him now.

This may be the first time he's ever had a makeout session with a Fodlan boy but you can bet he plans to figure out how to be better for the next time.]

[Luckily enough for Dedue - Sylvain has little patience for complete ineptitude. If it was truly awful, he'd simply push on and try something else. As it is, though, while it's a bit halting and unsure... it isn't bad. Even that much is endearing.

So he deepens the kiss further still for a while until he has to pull away - somewhat unwillingly - to catch his breath. And when he does, even he's flushed a little as he smiles at his friend.]

[Panting softly, he realizes how little air he's been getting this entire time. It's amazing really. Dedue looks at Sylvain's handsome face, admiring how the blush looks on him. He really is a striking man.

Before he realizes it, he's touching his cheek lightly, tracing the blush on that pale skin. When it dawns on him what he's doing, he goes still, unsure if such contact is welcome.]

I apologize...

[He should have asked.]

[Such contact is more than welcome, and Sylvain is just leaning into the touch when Dedue... pauses. So he turns slightly instead to press a kiss to his palm before settling back to lean into his hand.]

What for?

[But... wait. It does occur to him that he told Dedue to tell him if he crosses a line, but... he might not realize that Sylvain himself doesn't really have a line. It only makes sense that he offers him the same consideration, then.]

I'll let you know if you do something wrong, alright? Otherwise, just do what feels right. I don't mind.

[That causes Dedue to relax right away. Sylvain will tell him if he goes too far. He believes that he will too. Even if he's realizing a bit belatedly that Sylvain probably doesn't have a too far...

He'll have to keep that in mind for the future. To stop when the other wants him to keep going but it would only hurt him. For today, he settles for lightly stroking his cheek with his thumb. Does the roughness of his hands from so much labor and combat feel good to the red head?

Well, he seems to be enjoying himself. Dedue nods a small bit to show his understanding. They will let each other know if they go too far.]

[He doesn't really have a too far - or if he does, then it's certainly not a point he anticipates that Dedue would be able or even willing to reach. At least not intentionally, at any rate.

For now, though, they're nowhere near it, with this gentle affection, and he lets his eyes slip shut as he sighs at the gentle affection. He's warm, and it's nice, how the roughness of his skin contrasts so starkly with the softness of the action. It's... very Dedue. Very grounding. Relaxing.

Dangerous. He could get used to this, and in fact does shift even closer still, pressing flush against him from hips to chest.]

[Sylvain must be almost as affection starved as he is. While he can believe that the other man sleeps around and flirts and kisses and cuddles with plenty, he has doubts that he has quiet moments like this with many. This somehow doesn't surprise the man from Duscur based on all that he knows about him.

So when he feels him shift to press against him, he does what feels natural. He moves his arm to wrap around his waist and hold him close. To offer safety with him. As much as this is Sylvain offering him aid, Dedue wouldn't be Dedue if he weren't finding some way to help in return.

For now, this is what he can offer.]

[He is - he might not realize he is, except in the very rare moment of clarity, but... he is. So when he's given a quiet moment like this, all soft affection and sweet actions, he isn't quite sure how to handle it. Much less when Dedue is the one to hold him close like he is.

So he just sort of... melts against him, basking in the soft affection, letting himself press as close as possible, but also drops his head down to rest on Dedue's shoulder, nuzzling into his neck and pressing soft kisses to his skin.

He can't be left completely on the back foot, after all, and while the cuddling is generating quite a bit of chroma - as that was the pretense for all this in the first place - the kisses do spark more with each new press to skin.]

[The soft kisses are nice. Dedue relaxes with them, softly stroking Sylvain's back. Almost as if to reassure him that this is fine. Because he can tell that the other is a little flustered. A little out of his depth. It's a shame too because Sylvain deserves to have affection like this more often.

Inspiration strikes and he turns his head. Soon, a soft kiss is pressed into the red hair. Gentle, caring. As nice as the chroma is, honestly the emotional aspect of offering something pure to his companion means more to Dedue.]

[He's not really used to feeling this out of his depth anymore, especially not when he isn't trying something new... But it isn't bad - at least not with Dedue, and he sighs, relaxing even further at the gentle stroking over his back.

Though when Dedue is the one to initiate a kiss - even just one to his head, into his hair - he freezes for a second before nestling even further into his neck and shoulder to hide just how dark he knows his blush has gotten, hoping he can't see his ears turning red, or realize what the heat on his face against his skin means.]

[Oh. Sylvain is flustered. He's realizing that fully now. It's actually a surprisingly cute thing. He smiles softly but keeps stroking his back to reassure him that he can hide away as long as he needs to. Dedue won't look or tell a soul.

But he will give his hair one more kiss for good measure. The results of the last mean it's too good to pass up.]

[He's very flustered. He'd forgotten what being this flustered was like, but the reassurance does help quite a lot. It's calming... though he doesn't come out of hiding just yet.

Especially not when Dedue presses another one of those soft kisses to his hair just when he starts to think he's getting control of how flustered he is.

He isn't, clearly.

So he does the first thing that comes to mind that just might have any hope of getting Dedue at least somewhat flustered, too - he nips a line up his neck gently, just enough to sting but not enough to hurt, a graze of teeth that pulls the affection he's giving out of the realm of 'soft and gentle' and into something a shade more intense until he gets up to his jaw, where he presses a harder kiss with just the slightest graze of teeth instead of a proper nip or bite.]

[It doesn't take him long to realize that Sylvain is shifting the tone of this to turn things around. It's strange how that keeps him grounded. Perhaps he should be flustered to move back into territory that he's not familiar with but honestly just knowing that he's keeping an eye on things that will make the other feel good and comfortable means he can keep himself in the moment.

Pale strands of hair fall into his face as he shifts his head to welcome the stinging contact, gasping softly. It stings but it tingles in a pleasant way. He can feel it stirring through his entire body as he moves his hand up into that soft red hair. Just a warm presence to reassure Sylvain that he can keep going.

Dedue is fine now. He's found his place in this even if he still lacks the skill. But that he plans to learn by paying attention now.]

[He has to - Dedue had come to him for help with this, so that's what he intends to do. He can't just continue to sit here and be flustered, as nice as the soft, gentle affection had been. He has enough sense to know that that will be an overarching theme when it comes to being with Dedue anyway - and so he can't allow it to get him flustered every time.

So he pulls it back to something more overtly sexual, something he's more accustomed to.

So he kisses down Dedue's jaw until he reaches his chin, dips lower for a moment to bite a little harder than before against his pulse before moving back to kiss him on the lips with far more intensity than he had initially.]

[This seems a safety blanket for Sylvain. Avoid emotions through physical contact. Sexual physical contact. He's not sure if it will help in the long run, in fact he's sure it won't. However, wounds like that take time to heal and for now if this will help his companion to feel better then he doesn't mind.

A soft intake of breath happens when he feels the bite to his skin, his pulse getting faster. As soon as those lips are back on his own, he cups his head again to hold him there. New territory or not, he can at least follow easily enough. And it doesn't take a genius to figure out how Sylvain enjoys him holding him so close like this.

Honestly he likes it too.]

[He'd be right to assume that - avoiding emotions (or, in most cases, the lack thereof) with sex is something Sylvain falls back on time and again, and this instance is no different. There's a bit of guilt there - Dedue deserves better - but at the same time, he'd promised to tell him if he went too far, and so he had to trust that his friend would actually follow through on that.

Not that he would. But Dedue always has had more sense than him.

For now, though, he relishes in being held close, in kissing him hard, in reaching up to drag both hands through his hair this time as he drapes both arms over Dedue's shoulders so he can press ever closer.

And maybe he can be forgiven for rolling his hips against Dedue's, too, just to test how receptive he might be to pushing even further still.]

[He's very much forgiven. Forgiven and welcomed. Dedue releases a soft sound against the lips pressed to his own. On pure instinct, his other hand presses to Sylvain's lower back to beckon him to continue as he wishes. He won't be telling him to stop. Not this time. His only true regret is that he lacks so much knowledge to be able to know what to do next.

Since he's rather fully assumed he will die alone guarding Dimitri until his death, he really hasn't done any research. And without true guardians to tell him the facts of life...

Well, he'll have to learn. And trust that Sylvain will have no problem telling him what to do. Something he's grateful for since it means he can better adapt and learn how to better care for his companions in this new way.

Guide him, Sylvain. He's ready to learn.]

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